my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize