I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
