his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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