if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
