Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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