Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
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