I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize