I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
