Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
