i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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