There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize