everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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