maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
