That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
