The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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