After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Drunk is a universal language darling
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
