How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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