girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
you had me at cake vodka
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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