I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
