Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
