North Korea, Best Korea!
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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