Plan B is the new Plan A
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
