im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
