do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Sponge bath it is.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
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