This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
