does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
