it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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