This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
