Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
