very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
