He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
