I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
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