these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
