I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
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