The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
