I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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