This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Did I show you my penis last night?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Randomize