If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
