I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize