I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
