sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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