Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Randomize
