marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
