I'm so fucking centered right now
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
