Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
