Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
