Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize