There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Please don't give away my fajitas
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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