Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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