dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
