I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
